Day 98 of Training: Treadmills & the Gym

It's October. It's pitch dark when I leave to go run at 6:00am, not to mention bitterly cold. Each rushing breathe of frosty air stings my lungs. I decided it was time for a change. I thought maybe it was time to invest in a treadmill. We looked all over the internet, researched like crazy and for the ones that you could run on... not just walk or jog... the price tag was unbearable. Way more than I wanted to spend on a piece of equipment that I would only use 3-4 months of the year. Even with my pool I get a good 6-7 months out of!

I decided to go with a gym membership. After searching around I found a gym that I could go to for only $10/mo. Not bad... I have to have a 1 year contract but I can freeze my account for a few months too.

I show up the first day to the gym. There's ONE treadmill available, I stand there and realize there's way too many buttons. I decide rather than standing there pushing buttons and looking like a fool I'll go and grab someone that works there and ask them to help me... and look like a fool. I run to find someone and when I come back the treadmill is taken... I had left my drink and a towel on it but... I politely grab it, let it go and I see someone else getting off. They get off the treadmill and leave... WITHOUT WIPING IT DOWN! Gross! I clean off the machine and get ready to start. The guy comes over and shows me the important buttons and I start. I'll admit that my first day was the worst day. None of those things happened again.

The more I go, the more I hate it! I'm not... like... going anywhere! OK, so I know that's what happens but I didn't think I'd miss it that much. I love being outside, feeling the sun on my skin, breathing in gulps of fresh air having the variations in the way my feet step on the ground. Each step is different and unique. I'm going to the beat of my music, I have time to reflect on my upcoming day and my life, I create goals and best of all... if I get tired for a minute I can't just stop and say... good enough. I have to get home.

In the gym there are stupid LOUD boys trying to get the attention of everyone around them while they're lifting weights. I feel like I'm breathing in everyone's sweat. The air is thick, it smells, and worst of all I feel like I have an audience. There's also the difference of my running performance. When I run outside I feel like I'm propelling myself forward, if anything I have to keep reminding myself to slow down and take it easy. I have the natural hills and the different types of surfaces that make it so I run a little differently through parts of my run. The treadmill is always the same, I can create artificial hills but it's not nearly the same feeling. I also feel like I'm just going at this machine like pace. It doesn't feel natural at all.

So, I have a problem. How do I get outside to run in my day when it's not black as night and 30 below zero? I have 4 kids, 2 of which aren't in school yet. I've tried to run with them in a stroller and it's just awful. I hate it that I can't swing my arms and even through my ear phones I can hear the constant bickering and whining. I've decided that I do this for me and that I NEED the alone time in the morning. It's the only time of the day that it's me, alone, with my own thoughts, without someone needing me or calling "Mom!", it's the only time I'm taking care of myself and not someone else. It's my way of telling myself that I'm important and that I need to love my body. I can't do this while pushing my kids in a stroller in front of me whining that they want to get out, or they want a drink, or that "Dylan touched my arm!".

Well, I'm still working on the answer. My husband and I are trying to work it out so that I can run outside during daylight hours. It's progressing. What I can tell you is that the treadmill is not for me. I'm glad that I didn't buy one. It's so much better outside!

OH! I also started running 5 miles this week! I'm pretty excited about that. Monday I'm officially starting the marathon training program. I'm nervous, excited and scared kind of all at once. More excited than anything though... here we go! Wish me luck!

Day 82 of Training: My Music

I got online yesterday morning and figured out a route that was 4.5 miles. I plugged my earphones into my ears and headed out the door. I felt like I was dragging and uncoordinated. I had a hard time breathing and I had to concentrate way too much on my breaths, which is distracting. In no time though I felt like I was in sync. My feet were hitting to the time of the music I was listening to and I was feeling pretty good.

I just finished my 3rd mile and my iPhone rang. My iPhone is tied around my waste so I couldn't see who was calling but I was worried that something happened at home while I was gone. My earphones allow me to talk so I squeezed the button and said "hello". Nobody answered, I could hear breathing besides my own and busy sounds going on. I thought maybe they didn't hear me answer so I repeated. Nothing. Then I realized it was probably one of my sister's kids that got a hold of her phone and she didn't know they had called me. I keep running... the problem is... I don't know how to hang up with the earphones. Getting my iPhone out would take way too much coordination... I can run and talk at the same time but not run and try to work electronics at the same time. Besides... I'd have to lift up my shirt to access the phone which would show off my belly a bit... something the general public does NOT want to see. In the meantime I'm stuck listening to breathing, car doors clanking and people talking through my earphones. Aarrggghhh!

Each step seems like eternity! I frantically keep squeezing the button for my headphones trying to figure out how to hang up. There has to be a way to hang up! I have about a mile left and finally decide I'm going to squeeze it for 5 seconds and see what happens. I hold and count and... still noise.. oh wait... my music!!! YAY!! I have my music! My steps quickly fall into the rythm of the music.

By now my legs are hurting and I feel weak. I still have about 1/2 a mile left. I have a song that's coming to the end and I decide that I would just run through the next song and then walk the rest. The song starts, it's a good beat for the way I'm feeling. My feet are hitting the pavement with the drumbeat. Wow! This song is long! I'm pretty sure that I would have quit by now if I wouldn't have made that little deal with myself and if I wasn't do darned determined to finish my goals! I'm about to turn my last corner. I keep thinking the song should end any moment. I finally reach my house and the song ends at the same time. I look at the running application on my phone.... 4.54 miles 10 1/2 minute mile. 10 1/2 minute mile... well... I'm not going to win any awards but not so bad!! I keep listening to the music while I walk off the stiffness I'm starting to feel in my legs. Wait though! 4.5 miles! That's pretty awesome! The longest distance I've run so far! I'm excited about that and stretch out all my muscles really well to prevent soreness.

4.5 miles, only... I wouldn't have made it without my music. It's funny how that can keep you going. It reminds me of something a friend said to me a while ago. She said that she was in the middle of a long race and her iPod broke in the middle of the race. She felt like sitting on the ground and throwing in the towel. She said the rest of the race was miserable and she kept thinking... what's the point? She felt like she couldn't run without the music. I guess that's how I feel too! I can push myself a little harder just to stay on beat. I can go a little longer, longer than I thought I could because the song hasn't ended. I can breathe a little easier because I'm breathing in between the words of the songs. I don't think I could run (or do much of anything else) without my music playing as I go, pushing me along.